Apparently Reader’s Digest thinks I’m an ass. In May, they did an article and survey entitled Frugal or Tightwad? As a society we have this image of a tightwad as some geriatric jerk, huddled in a homemade shanty, figuring out how he can screw the Care Bears out of Christmas, all because he wasn’t hugged enough as a child; now every time he pays a penny out of his misshapen hands, it destroys what’s left us his hollow soul, as money is all he has left.
Seriously, if that’s what you truly believe, you need a lobotomy. A tightwad, by definition, is tight with their wad/wallet! (Stop giggling, please.) Tightwads identify places where they don’t have to spend, where as frugalists work to identify places they can save. In truth, both philosophies must work together for a fiscally sensible process. There is no reason to spend money you don’t have to, and there is no reason to spend more money than you have to.
I get tired of this idea that to be a thrifty person, you have to be unethical or disloyal. Yes, I’m a horrible person. Since we can’t go out to bars and clubs with our friends, I invite people over for barbecues and pot lucks. For shame! I can’t afford to give much to charity, so I try to click on sites that get donations for clicks. Dear god, I’m evil!
People who are willing to violate laws and generally accepted ethics (trying not to impose my own here) are not frugalists or tightwads, they’re poor human beings. There are people who are willing to do unkind, or spiteful things to save a dollar. They will sit and complain about how all the entitled people have caused these horrible economic situations we’re in, and then sign up for multiple e-mail accounts to receive as many discounts as possible (ignoring that whole one per household rule). I start to laugh when they justify it with their own twisted sense of entitlement as a “little guy sticking it to the man.”
You can be a jerk or have an open heart, no matter what fiscal sensibility you subscribe to. I get tired of these articles that identify those who are thrifty and happen to be rude, discourteous, unethical, or criminal as “tightwads.” I am a tightwad. I don’t like spending money, but I love to be helpful, try to be compassionate, and above all, I’m not a jerk.
I believe those who think that are the haters. People would rather believe these bad aspects of being a tightwad because it makes them feel better about themselves not being frugal. At least that is my opinion.
Here, here! Frugality actually helps me donate MORE, because it stretches my giving dollars.
And if I'm expected to prop up the economy by buying things I don't want or need, well, let's examine what's wrong with the economic system in this country, shall we?
You said it, Donna! And it's not just the USA, it's the same north of the border. SPEND SPEND SPEND more than you can afford, to get the country back on its feet!
Junebug, I agree 100 %! My sister makes twice as much as I do, and constantly tried to poke at me for being "cheap". Until I told her that the ONLY debt we have is our mortgage … now she wants to know how we live this well on so little income (we were both laid off last fall).
We don't have cash to donate. We go through the house regularly and always have at least one "charity thrift store" donations box going. I volunteer at the food bank; he does handyman chores for elderly neighbours for free. We give what we have to give.
I think there is a lot to said for saving your money, especially if its not just to buy more crap down the road.
Wow everyone! Thank you for your comments.
@junebug: I've never thought about the psychological aspects, but that makes sense. It's easy for people to put down what they don't understand as bad or ridiculous.
@Donna: That's because you're not trapped in the "I want more" cycle. Most people see stretches in their dollars as an excuse to purchase more "things." Not everyone is raised to help their fellow man.
@Kate: I still don't understand how some people think that the way to solvency is to spend. ?:) I think what you and your husband do is lovely and should be noted, and I hope your sister gets on the bandwagon soon.
@Eric A: I do have a recurring nightmare that when I'm completely debt free, I'm going to go on a massive shopping spree and ruin everything. Then I look around to see what I would buy, and I can't see anything worthwhile. Makes it easy.
I am frugal, and on a campaign to help anyone that wants advice to jump on this bandwagon. Being frugal (not cheap) is a choice that isn't encouraged so I'm eager to help people see the light. A woman today asked me where I got the great coupon I was using at the grocery store and I gave her some advice to get her started saving money. There's generousity in helping others help themselves. I'm frugal too, and you're not a jerk because you're frugal.
One of the recurring topics on my blog is "frugal ethics." The points I've made include: 1. sign up for and participate in whatever discount, program or community service you HONESTLY qualify for. 2. Don't diss the help you do get.
This is the best article I have read in a while. And it describes me 100%. I don’t ever spend money or buy things I don’t want or need when I don’t have to. And I would be the same way even if I ever won the lottery. I would then spend my money on vacations/memories and my 2 dogs while still trying to keep saving money.
And I am a nice person and tight with my money when ever I have to be.
I think there should be nothing wrong with not buying things you don’t want or need.